'Twas the week before holiday break
And the parents were panic-shopping
My 4YO is home with Brett and I this Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I was on kid duty until 10:30 or so, at which point Brett took said kid to do something in the garage, at which point I was going to be very focused and hardworking. Friends, I have spent the last two hours not writing this newsletter, which is what I had planned on doing, but PUZZLING because apparently I am physically incapable of doing anything other than puzzling when an unfinished puzzle is in my immediate vicinity. Now, the aforementioned kid is driving various trucks over my feet and yelling at me to make a better bridge with my legs and I’m writing this newsletter.
It’s December 18th, and my brain feels fully broken. I’m hoping my 2024 brain is a new and significantly improved version.
After polling other people with brains, I’ve gotten the following responses (re: capacity of their brains):
“Why doesn’t the whole world get the entire month of December off?”
“Someone scheduled a meeting this week which I think should be illegal.”
“Email is starting to feel very untethered from reality. Does it really matter if one responds to it?”
For parents of children who attend school, this week (December 18th - December 22nd) is also when we celebrate THE GREAT ANNUAL FRENZY. This, of course, is when we frantically attempt to line up childcare for the following week; frantically cobble together sick days and vacation days to account for the inability to secure childcare for the following week; and frantically try to do two weeks’ worth of work in one week! Happy Frenzy to all who celebrate!
If you’re a particular type of lucky parent, you might also be celebrating the annual Mad Dash to Panic Order Random Shit in a futile, misguided attempt to create an ideal holiday full of wonder, delight, and sibling harmony.