The internet LOVES telling me what will “change my life in under five minutes,” or “the one morning routine that I’ll never skip again,” or” “5 easy hacks to go from blah to BLISS,” and listen, I love this shit.
As a fundamentally lazy person, I will not stop believing in quick and dirty ways to improve my life (with little to no effort on my part). And I can’t fathom a world in which I have to get through every day not choosing to believe in the delusion of hot water and lemon to make me the BEST me.
Thanks to a dear friend who KNOWS me, I own this tshirt (Poog Hags, I see you!)
But I also like to rebel in the face of other people’s best practices.
Sorry I don’t care if sunshine first thing is better than playing my little word games. Connections MUST be played. I don’t care if dressing in non-sweats somehow alters my self-perception or productivity or whateverrrrrr for the better. I don’t care if the cool down is the most important part of the workout!
And for most of my life, I’ve said a hearty fuck off to the “always make your bed in the morning” people.
AND YET.
I did THIS the other day and friends, I regret to tell you that it had an impossible-to-deny positive effect on my overall wellbeing. Not only did I create a clean base for the afternoon’s eventual laundry piles, I felt internally like less of a mess. I got to enjoy the aesthetic impact of objects I had very deliberately chosen. And every time I walked by the made bed I felt smug little bursts of happy chemicals coursing through my veins. It was the worst.
Now, to be clear, I have not repeated this practice since last week. BUT STILL. The proof of the made bed (for me!) was undeniable.
So I want to know. What (annoyingly, regrettably, obnoxiously) makes your life better?
Instead of "revenge procrastinating" late into the night by staying up and having 'me' time finally (whether this is watching a movie, reading a book, scrolling on my phone), I've found that going to bed early instead ANNOYINGLY makes me feel much more well rested in the morning and my mental health is even better than when I RP'd later into the night. 😒
What I’ve found is that the entire day feels better, so I don’t have the same emotional urge to RP. And then, in the evening the next day, I get sleepy earlier and the positive cycle continues. It’s irritatingly effective!
Not drinking 😩 stopped a year and a half ago. Wasn’t that heavy of a drinker to begin with. I stopped for reasons outside of health (was going through grief and a depressant didn’t help things) and I regret to inform you that I feel overall better and “clearer.” (I will have a single glass of wine every couple of months or so, but I actually keep it at one glass instead of it inevitably evolving into 3).
Yuuuuuup it’s absolutely this. Zero alcohol is, annoyingly, THE move, and actually makes the effects of all the other moves like lemon water more apparent. If you know anyone with one of those wearable health monitor bracelets/rings, they can show you how fucked your restorative sleep gets after even a single glass of wine. It’s also been a year and a half for me, and while I think about the actual drink itself almost never, I’m regularly finding new reasons and confirmations for the choice to swear it off.
Porridge (oatmeal) for breakfast! I resisted it for years. YEARS. With added chia and walnuts for protein, it keeps me full until lunchtime and it's like a balm for my IBS gut. It's so boring and dependable, I hate it. I love it.
Definitely waking up early-ish and going outside for early morning sunlight. It’s a positive feedback loop because the more I do this, the more settled my circadian rhythm is so I wake up early without an alarm and keep the cycle going.
Drinking water. Ugh. I WISH THIS WASNT HELPFUL! Going for a walk. Blegh. Taking about 10-15 minutes in the evening to ask myself what are a few things I can do now that will make life easier/more harmonious in the morning. As much as I resent this, I am always so grateful the next morning when I don’t have to do as much.
...getting up at 5am. Before my kids. And doing yoga. And sometimes writing. And obnoxiously telling people I've done it because by 9am, when I've dropped my kids at school, I feel positively and annoyingly chirpy and wonderful.
Ugh it’s true but waking before sunrise is so unnatural to me. I’m currently trying to get back to waking early after a summer mostly off of it, but the shortening days isn’t helping me!
Yes, it's getting harder and harder as autumn rolls on. But that's when I acknowledge that shadowy, lazier part of me, and let her take the lead (also another annoying take home from walking down wellness and spiritual paths). I think extra sleep is just as beneficial as a 5am downward dog.
Consistency. It's really, really annoying but being consistent about any positive practice, whether it is making the bed, putting on face serums, getting up early, going to the gym, whatever it is consistency makes it better. This is endlessly annoying to me because I am not a consistent person by nature. I hate eating the same thing, doing the same thing, I love taking the easy path and wouldn't you know it, consistency really does make everything better (I say, grumbling to myself, as I make my stupid little chart in my stupid little journal to keep myself accountable)
I am eternally annoyed about exercise. For YEARS I resisted because I hate running, sweating, and going to the gym. It’s boring and unpleasant and gross and I WON’T do it. The lingering anxiety of gym class still lurks.
And yet…I took a pole dancing class on a whim five years ago and now it’s a huge part of my life that I really cherish. Doing my lil wiggles always makes me feel better and I am undeniably stronger and less frequently in pain. I’m so mad that the “exercise is fun!” people were right.
Reading the “hard” books! I finished one yesterday that I had to check out from the library three times to finish…but now I feel both smug and grateful for having read it? I am a mood reader for sure, and the conditions are not often optimal for serious nonfiction as frequently as for romance or sci-fi.
On the days I'm in the office, going for a walk around the city at lunch time. But not just going for a walk, going for a WALK! Looking all around me and appreciating my lovely city, and looking up at the beautiful buildings against the sky, and really looking at the people around me and enjoying interesting outfits, and taking a different route and finding surprising street art, or cute cafes, or a statue I haven't noticed, and leaning into enjoying the wind or the sun, or even the rain with an umbrella. And sometimes snapping a photo and sharing it with my colleagues in our chat when I get back.
I don't always get out, sometimes because I've got meetings, and sometimes because I get lazy and don't bother, but I always feel so happy and more energised if I do.
When A.K. got sober he told me that at rehab they had to make their beds every day because “messy bed, messy head” and I laughed it off. But a few years ago I started doing it randomly and fuck, those AA people got it right. My head DOES feel less messy and it sets the tone for the day.
After making my bed for several months every day I was finally able to go through with my long overdue decision to finally leave my husband. This shit is huge...
Absolutely this. After I put my kid to bed, if I don't start a podcast immediately I fall into some kind of trance and get sucked into my phone for at least half an hour. It's clear my brain just needs some kind of break once parenting is done for the night, but i need a podcast/audiobook to keep me rolling through mindless clean up tasks. Also feels like I'm getting to talk to another adult for the first time in a few hours!
1) exercise (helps to find something I love for its own sake). being active more often makes me one of those obnoxious people that actually wants to get up and move a lot more. sorry to my friends lol
2) feeling my feelings, not just talking about them or analyzing them! like, letting myself cry if I'm sad, or get angry if I'm angry. sometimes this can feel like I'm crying all the time lol (I'm not actually!) but then I genuinely feel better bc the emotions got to be expressed and can go on their merry way
I am right there with the no alcohol and drinking water friends. It’s annoying and it’s real! I’d also like to state that eating consistent salty, crunchy snacks has been a great move for me. When I do not have a decently full belly, which is pretty much needed throughout the entire day at this point, I feel horrible. Food helps my brain! Food helps my mood! Snacks on snacks and snacks!
Mary’s Gone Crackers with sliced white sharp cheddar cheese
From The Ground Up cauliflower stalks in the cheddar flavor (my daughter calls these “veggie blowouts” not because they make you poop but because they are a tube shape 😅😅 think Bugles from the 90s)
Unique Snacks original pretzel splits
The Good Crisp Company in the cheddar flavor (cheddar is clearly a theme that I will live by until the end of time)
Packing all the school lunches and my work lunch the night before. But save me from the mundanity of it. Can’t leave the house without making my bed though😇
Running I've been doing for a while but adding regular weight-lifting sessions has really made a difference in maintaining muscle tone in my 40s. I don't enjoy it because I can't just put on a podcast and go but everything is better when I lift regularly. I'm also a regular consumer of protein powder now and I sort of HATE admitting it even though Casey Johnston of Ask A Swole Woman is absolutely right about lifting and protein consumption.
I hear ya! How long have you been doing it? I'm ~12 weeks into trying to build the habit of strenght training (bodyweight and dumbbells) and one thing that helps me get motivated is how easy it is to see progress! As in, one day I'm not able to do more than 10 reps, three days later I crush 15. Keeping that momentum going is part of what keeps me coming back.
this is basically the first week where I'm trying to do some weight-lifting before going running. So far I'm doing three sets of eight, which doesn't sound like much, but for some reason feels like it's more. I'm currently lifting dumbbells and was told I should try barbells as well. I tried that once and got told I was lifting wrong and now I feel awkward about trying again!
If at all possible, I might schedule a couple of sessions with a trainer so that they can help you with form and give you some routines you can do on your own. I did that a while back, and the my postpartum PT gave me some other stuff that I've done while adding on more weight. I also don't run on the same days I lift to give my body some time to rest.
Not drinking! The wellness industry doesn't want us to know that we can have better skin, better sleep, less anxiety and depression, etc etc etc for free 🫠
also jumping on the making the bed train! (incidentally, was only able to start this when I stopped drinking and got less depressed)
Doing some exercise. I always feel great afterwards and I hate that exercise works.
On a more personal level, if I get up early and get something done I always feel so much better and calmer for the rest of the day. For some reason my body isn't listening and when I wake up my immediate thought is wanting to go back to sleep. Which I usually do!
Really annoying? Being tolerant and patient, and god help me, perhaps helpful and understanding with the person responsible for destroying the order of our home with their unfinished, sprawling and dear to their heart projects. Sigh.
Getting out of bed and going for a walk first thing. I go with a friend so I get the benefit of the early light and social connection and my idiotic little dog is better behaved all day. It’s the worst.
Also regular yoga. A really good Iyengar teacher moved to my neighborhood and now I try to go twice a week. I usually manage once. I hate going but I love having gone. The teacher teases me about not smiling in class -- she says "I've seen you smile so I know you can." Yoga does not make me smile.
Weekly meeting with myself—gratitude list, which is resisted but now serves to remind me of small and big things that happened; putting events in a paper planner; updating the electronic to do list from that planner so I don’t have to remember things; and now writing down things about my baby each week. I’m a habitual bed maker. It does make the day so much better. And you get to climb into a made bed at night. That’s a real pleasure you’ve gifted yourself.
I always make my bed in the morning the moment I get out of it, and as you found, it really is a great thing to do :) Also, I am, very aggravatingly, currently working out with a (remote) personal trainer three times a week - only because a very dear friend kindly gifted me a package of sessions with her trainer. I hate, loathe and detest every minute of it (nothing makes me happier than when occasionally he has to cancel at the last minute :)), but it does feel great afterwards, and I know it's improving my strength and health. UGH.
lol i've actually gotten to the point with exercise that it's become so necessary for my wellbeing it's somehow transitioned beyond annoyingly good for me and like, ESSENTIAL
oh and re how'd i get into the habit.....THAT is a good question. honestly i think it was having kids that made exercise feel like a delicious solitary escape rather than a chore? having that time to myself - and moving through all my new parent angst. it just became indispensable very quickly. OH and while running, i hang out with my parasocial podcast besties which is another treat.
ha maybe? my go to are jogs (I walk steep hills), and my cult of choice, the class. it's VERY white lady woo woo but i love it. a combo of strength, cardio, yoga, and huge focus on breathing and cathartic sounds. like grunts, squawks, whatever.
Ugh I hate this. Emptying the goddamn dishwasher every morning. If it’s empty, no one has an excuse not to put their dirty dishes in all day, after dinner cleanup is way easier, and the kitchen stays fairly reasonable for the next morning. I HATE that it’s a reasonable chore that takes less than 5 minutes. I’ve timed it bc I hate it soooo much.
someone already said it but no alcohol. Stopped bc I was dealing with health issues and it wasn't helping, and technically I am not "off" it, but I have probably 5 drinks a year at this point. I feel so much better, my weight shifted, my face looks different. I hadn't realized how much I had been drinking, until it was cold turkey gone. I do sweet tea with ice now, or coffee ice cream, or lemonade and sprite and ice- anything fun and cold for the evening, depending on the season!
I need to vacuum more than I do. Tracking my spending. I do make my bed every day- the apartment is so small that to not make it would have an enormous chaotic effect on the space.
Finding the kind of exercise that I don't like to miss bc it's so much fun. I go to ballet class 3x a week and enjoy it so much. I remember struggling so so bad with all other exercise- gym, running, walking, weights, etc etc.
Leaving the house at least once a day. I'm not an aimless "walk" kind of person so there has to be a destination- coffee shop, grocery store, etc. Luckily I walk to my job, so that's a guaranteed walk 5 days a week, and I have church/dance on the weekend, so my life takes me out of the house daily, and it's been good for me.
ooooh i really relate to the leaving the house once a day piece - i grumble about carting kids to after school events but it invariably makes me feel better to connect with humans and the greater community!
I recently discovered I’m also not an aimless walk (or bike ride or run) kind of person either. I so strongly prefer to have those things fit purposefully into the day’s other activities. It feels un-Zen, but I’m trying not to judge myself for it.
Since I'm breastfeeding and pumping, taking my vitamins and drinking plenty of water is annoyingly good for me (and baby). Forgetting my vitamins consistently reminds me what a difference they make on my milk production. Also, second the oatmeal for breakfast. Sometimes it's boring, but it's the easiest, best breakfast.
Expensive face serums AM and PM, a nightly gratitude practice (just writing down three good things that happened that day - I haven’t done it in a while and I notice the difference in my tolerance levels for the unexpected bullshit), walking outside a couple times a week, drinking so much water that I almost drown myself, and, lately, going to sleep completely sober (no alcohol or weed). Ugh.
My “trying to be a healthy 40-something” breakfast of plain Greek yogurt, defrosted frozen cherries, hemp seeds, slivered almonds and a sprinkle of granola. It’s healthy, it’s filling, it makes me feel good. I disliked Greek yogurt for years but finally realized I can just literally water it down to a preferable texture. Haven’t looked back!
Make the bed! - I'm a firm believer in clear surfaces to get/keep mind grounded (bed always works in the bedroom, but I can't guarantee any effects elsewhere]. If you just use a duvet, it's really so easy peasy. I also value clear kitchen counters, but that can be very challenging.
Not drinking caffeine after noon! I love tea and could happily drink it until I go to sleep. I read that it takes 12 hours for the caffeine in our system to half, and I do notice a difference in my ability to go to sleep.
Okay, I know it's been a minute since this post, but I was thinking about it today and had to come back because my answer is sports bras. Lately I've really been pushing back against tight or uncomfortable bras, bras that try to make my body do something it doesn't do, etc. I've been struggling to find my correct bra size so I've just been defaulting to Soma wireless bralettes that are like...good enough for now. BUT for the last few weeks I've been walking a few miles by the river at a pretty strong clip in a bra without enough support, and it's causing me some discomfort. I finally bought a new sports bra and I'm so annoyed at how much better it feels. I'm not even sure it quite fits properly but it's tight enough to hold everything in place and I am so much more comfortable. ARGH.
Doing my little skincare morning and night (nothing fancy just washing my face, moisturising and using sunscreen at the appropriate junctures). Also, ugh, exercise.
Making my bed every single day (except "sheets day" when I change the sheets) 100% helps me feel more centered and in control of my life. I started this twenty-five years ago after a bout with depression and I still swear by it. Do I still have major mood swings, depression, and anxiety? Of course. But this tiny little thing helps me feel better. So annoying, I know. I also like folding laundry and putting it away, so I'm just super annoying.
A big one: When getting asked to do something firstly listen to myself if I really want to do this instead of giving in to my innate reflex to say "Yes, of course". And then actually say no if I mean no. Absolute banger!
Oh, and I'm one for bed making, clears my head and I use it as a small creative act each day (god, I love linen). Does anyone know any good bed wear/linen substack pages?
Brushing my teeth (PM round) when I still have energy (say, a little while after dinner) rather than as a creaky, zombie right before bed when I can barely stand up...
Instead of "revenge procrastinating" late into the night by staying up and having 'me' time finally (whether this is watching a movie, reading a book, scrolling on my phone), I've found that going to bed early instead ANNOYINGLY makes me feel much more well rested in the morning and my mental health is even better than when I RP'd later into the night. 😒
Revenge procrastinating! That’s EXACTLY the right term for it.
Yes THIS. It makes me FURIOUS but it works
This is my exact answer as well and I hate it.
Same, and it's just rude
Have you found any good ways to get those moments for yourself into your day when you cut out the revenge procrastinating?
What I’ve found is that the entire day feels better, so I don’t have the same emotional urge to RP. And then, in the evening the next day, I get sleepy earlier and the positive cycle continues. It’s irritatingly effective!
Try reframing the early bedtime as a “reverse sleep-in” and see if that doesn’t help
A walk outside….and yet I resist it like it is one of the deadly sins.
Good one.
(Whispers) Drinking more water. IT IS SO BORING TO REMEMBER TO DO. But helps my migraine-prone brain so much. Ugh. The worst.
Not drinking 😩 stopped a year and a half ago. Wasn’t that heavy of a drinker to begin with. I stopped for reasons outside of health (was going through grief and a depressant didn’t help things) and I regret to inform you that I feel overall better and “clearer.” (I will have a single glass of wine every couple of months or so, but I actually keep it at one glass instead of it inevitably evolving into 3).
Yuuuuuup it’s absolutely this. Zero alcohol is, annoyingly, THE move, and actually makes the effects of all the other moves like lemon water more apparent. If you know anyone with one of those wearable health monitor bracelets/rings, they can show you how fucked your restorative sleep gets after even a single glass of wine. It’s also been a year and a half for me, and while I think about the actual drink itself almost never, I’m regularly finding new reasons and confirmations for the choice to swear it off.
I agree! The less alcohol I drink. the better I feel.
Came here to say this. I love wine. I love a cold cocktail… and yet I feel so much better and clear-headed without alcohol.
Ugh yes this. I’m still drinking 2-4 drinks per week but when I don’t drink at all I am a way less anxious person and a much more patient parent.
+1. Soooooo annoying to be that person. But I am. No more drinking. I just sleep so much better.
Porridge (oatmeal) for breakfast! I resisted it for years. YEARS. With added chia and walnuts for protein, it keeps me full until lunchtime and it's like a balm for my IBS gut. It's so boring and dependable, I hate it. I love it.
but also delicious?! (says an oatmeal lover lol)
Oooh yes, or with some almond butter. So dreary but so delicious.
Definitely waking up early-ish and going outside for early morning sunlight. It’s a positive feedback loop because the more I do this, the more settled my circadian rhythm is so I wake up early without an alarm and keep the cycle going.
Drinking water. Ugh. I WISH THIS WASNT HELPFUL! Going for a walk. Blegh. Taking about 10-15 minutes in the evening to ask myself what are a few things I can do now that will make life easier/more harmonious in the morning. As much as I resent this, I am always so grateful the next morning when I don’t have to do as much.
...getting up at 5am. Before my kids. And doing yoga. And sometimes writing. And obnoxiously telling people I've done it because by 9am, when I've dropped my kids at school, I feel positively and annoyingly chirpy and wonderful.
when you get MULTIPLE things done before 9 it's truly like you've become superhuman
Ugh it’s true but waking before sunrise is so unnatural to me. I’m currently trying to get back to waking early after a summer mostly off of it, but the shortening days isn’t helping me!
Yes, it's getting harder and harder as autumn rolls on. But that's when I acknowledge that shadowy, lazier part of me, and let her take the lead (also another annoying take home from walking down wellness and spiritual paths). I think extra sleep is just as beneficial as a 5am downward dog.
Not looking at screens half an hour before bed really DOES make me sleep better and I'm SO MAD about it
truuuuuly
Consistency. It's really, really annoying but being consistent about any positive practice, whether it is making the bed, putting on face serums, getting up early, going to the gym, whatever it is consistency makes it better. This is endlessly annoying to me because I am not a consistent person by nature. I hate eating the same thing, doing the same thing, I love taking the easy path and wouldn't you know it, consistency really does make everything better (I say, grumbling to myself, as I make my stupid little chart in my stupid little journal to keep myself accountable)
Going to bed and waking up at the same time every day instead of 'catching up' and sleeping in on the weekends 😒
I am eternally annoyed about exercise. For YEARS I resisted because I hate running, sweating, and going to the gym. It’s boring and unpleasant and gross and I WON’T do it. The lingering anxiety of gym class still lurks.
And yet…I took a pole dancing class on a whim five years ago and now it’s a huge part of my life that I really cherish. Doing my lil wiggles always makes me feel better and I am undeniably stronger and less frequently in pain. I’m so mad that the “exercise is fun!” people were right.
oh SO fun! yes finding a FUN way to move (or at least one that feels good) is huge.
I started a Pilates class by accident because I forgot to cancel the free trial on an app… and five months later I am still going every week!
Pole dancing is so great! I also found exercise I love in it. If you want to be further enabled, chair acrobatics is also great ;)
Reading the “hard” books! I finished one yesterday that I had to check out from the library three times to finish…but now I feel both smug and grateful for having read it? I am a mood reader for sure, and the conditions are not often optimal for serious nonfiction as frequently as for romance or sci-fi.
On the days I'm in the office, going for a walk around the city at lunch time. But not just going for a walk, going for a WALK! Looking all around me and appreciating my lovely city, and looking up at the beautiful buildings against the sky, and really looking at the people around me and enjoying interesting outfits, and taking a different route and finding surprising street art, or cute cafes, or a statue I haven't noticed, and leaning into enjoying the wind or the sun, or even the rain with an umbrella. And sometimes snapping a photo and sharing it with my colleagues in our chat when I get back.
I don't always get out, sometimes because I've got meetings, and sometimes because I get lazy and don't bother, but I always feel so happy and more energised if I do.
Yes, the mid day walk does WONDERS!
When A.K. got sober he told me that at rehab they had to make their beds every day because “messy bed, messy head” and I laughed it off. But a few years ago I started doing it randomly and fuck, those AA people got it right. My head DOES feel less messy and it sets the tone for the day.
right?!
After making my bed for several months every day I was finally able to go through with my long overdue decision to finally leave my husband. This shit is huge...
shut UP - this IS MASSIVE.
Another one: washing all the dishes and wiping down the counters before bed. I can only do it while listening to a podcast though!
without podcasts i would do almost zero chores lol
hard same!
Same, but the podcast has to be one hosted by Michael Hobbes. There’s something about his energy that sets the pace for dishes.
I am very partial to a Michael Hobbes podcast! I also enjoy washing dishes to Sarah Marshall and Chelsea Weber-Smith.
Absolutely this. After I put my kid to bed, if I don't start a podcast immediately I fall into some kind of trance and get sucked into my phone for at least half an hour. It's clear my brain just needs some kind of break once parenting is done for the night, but i need a podcast/audiobook to keep me rolling through mindless clean up tasks. Also feels like I'm getting to talk to another adult for the first time in a few hours!
1) exercise (helps to find something I love for its own sake). being active more often makes me one of those obnoxious people that actually wants to get up and move a lot more. sorry to my friends lol
2) feeling my feelings, not just talking about them or analyzing them! like, letting myself cry if I'm sad, or get angry if I'm angry. sometimes this can feel like I'm crying all the time lol (I'm not actually!) but then I genuinely feel better bc the emotions got to be expressed and can go on their merry way
I am right there with the no alcohol and drinking water friends. It’s annoying and it’s real! I’d also like to state that eating consistent salty, crunchy snacks has been a great move for me. When I do not have a decently full belly, which is pretty much needed throughout the entire day at this point, I feel horrible. Food helps my brain! Food helps my mood! Snacks on snacks and snacks!
snacks for the win!
Which snacks? I need to diversify my snack selection. I also like salty, crunchy things!
i need to shout these out - current obsession
https://www.bjs.com/product/whisps-parmesan-cheese-crisps-108-oz/3000000000004336753?fulfillment=shipping&bjext=&lob=omni&chl=pdsch&dt=20220728&tcz=pmax&opz1=_17879974687___&utm_campaign=B0000SPN_Omni_Google_EVGRN_NONE_GROCERY_NONE_pmax_NONE_ACQ&utm_source=google&vnd=ggad&utm_medium=cpc&utm_term=_&utm_IDs=GG_17879974687___&&campaignID=17879974687&network=x&adcreative=&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwl6-3BhBWEiwApN6_kmiaFrbw4pTD6DXY9vjCkkeef1rUD2Dv5EMSBqYIvbDgX__iT4blmRoCmScQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds
Thank you!!
Ok hear me out… put a sliced pickle (spicy or dill) on top of one of these and pop it all in your mouth at once. DELIGHTFULLY DELICIOUS!!
Oh yes ok! Here are my top current faves:
Mary’s Gone Crackers with sliced white sharp cheddar cheese
From The Ground Up cauliflower stalks in the cheddar flavor (my daughter calls these “veggie blowouts” not because they make you poop but because they are a tube shape 😅😅 think Bugles from the 90s)
Unique Snacks original pretzel splits
The Good Crisp Company in the cheddar flavor (cheddar is clearly a theme that I will live by until the end of time)
Enjoy, enjoy! <3
Thank you!!
Having all the laundry done on Sunday nights which never ever ever happens
I've been reluctantly doing laundry on Sundays and damn if it doesn't actually start my week off on the right foot 😑
Packing all the school lunches and my work lunch the night before. But save me from the mundanity of it. Can’t leave the house without making my bed though😇
Running I've been doing for a while but adding regular weight-lifting sessions has really made a difference in maintaining muscle tone in my 40s. I don't enjoy it because I can't just put on a podcast and go but everything is better when I lift regularly. I'm also a regular consumer of protein powder now and I sort of HATE admitting it even though Casey Johnston of Ask A Swole Woman is absolutely right about lifting and protein consumption.
Lifting heavy things has done wonders for me in lots of ways!
ugh, I've just started weight-lifting and struggling to make it a habit. I know it's good for me but I never feel motivated like I do with running.
I hear ya! How long have you been doing it? I'm ~12 weeks into trying to build the habit of strenght training (bodyweight and dumbbells) and one thing that helps me get motivated is how easy it is to see progress! As in, one day I'm not able to do more than 10 reps, three days later I crush 15. Keeping that momentum going is part of what keeps me coming back.
this is basically the first week where I'm trying to do some weight-lifting before going running. So far I'm doing three sets of eight, which doesn't sound like much, but for some reason feels like it's more. I'm currently lifting dumbbells and was told I should try barbells as well. I tried that once and got told I was lifting wrong and now I feel awkward about trying again!
If at all possible, I might schedule a couple of sessions with a trainer so that they can help you with form and give you some routines you can do on your own. I did that a while back, and the my postpartum PT gave me some other stuff that I've done while adding on more weight. I also don't run on the same days I lift to give my body some time to rest.
I'll ask at the gym and see if it's an option! Thanks for the tip!
Not drinking! The wellness industry doesn't want us to know that we can have better skin, better sleep, less anxiety and depression, etc etc etc for free 🫠
also jumping on the making the bed train! (incidentally, was only able to start this when I stopped drinking and got less depressed)
Doing some exercise. I always feel great afterwards and I hate that exercise works.
On a more personal level, if I get up early and get something done I always feel so much better and calmer for the rest of the day. For some reason my body isn't listening and when I wake up my immediate thought is wanting to go back to sleep. Which I usually do!
And the more you do exercise, the MORE it works... absolutely toxic!
it's the universe's sick sense of humour!
Really annoying? Being tolerant and patient, and god help me, perhaps helpful and understanding with the person responsible for destroying the order of our home with their unfinished, sprawling and dear to their heart projects. Sigh.
wow this is NEXT level impressive
Hugs to you Erica! I have one of those too.
Getting out of bed and going for a walk first thing. I go with a friend so I get the benefit of the early light and social connection and my idiotic little dog is better behaved all day. It’s the worst.
Also regular yoga. A really good Iyengar teacher moved to my neighborhood and now I try to go twice a week. I usually manage once. I hate going but I love having gone. The teacher teases me about not smiling in class -- she says "I've seen you smile so I know you can." Yoga does not make me smile.
I thought of another one: cleaning my glasses! Life makes more sense when I can see clearly!
omg i do this maybe biweekly and i'm always like, wow this is miraculous lol
These comments are all beautiful. Thanks for the brilliant question and positioning Sara ✨
Weekly meeting with myself—gratitude list, which is resisted but now serves to remind me of small and big things that happened; putting events in a paper planner; updating the electronic to do list from that planner so I don’t have to remember things; and now writing down things about my baby each week. I’m a habitual bed maker. It does make the day so much better. And you get to climb into a made bed at night. That’s a real pleasure you’ve gifted yourself.
LOVE this idea of a weekly meeting with oneself!
Washing my face and applying face and eye cream at bedtime. It gives me a minute to wind down and take care of myself—but just for that minute.
Everything everyone’s written plus stretching. And, like, eating lunch. Why, lunch, why?????
Yes to stretching! Wowee, it feels so much better to move!
OMG stretching!!!! game changer
I always make my bed in the morning the moment I get out of it, and as you found, it really is a great thing to do :) Also, I am, very aggravatingly, currently working out with a (remote) personal trainer three times a week - only because a very dear friend kindly gifted me a package of sessions with her trainer. I hate, loathe and detest every minute of it (nothing makes me happier than when occasionally he has to cancel at the last minute :)), but it does feel great afterwards, and I know it's improving my strength and health. UGH.
lol i've actually gotten to the point with exercise that it's become so necessary for my wellbeing it's somehow transitioned beyond annoyingly good for me and like, ESSENTIAL
What’s your go-to exercise and how did you get into the habit? Maybe that’s a whole post?
oh and re how'd i get into the habit.....THAT is a good question. honestly i think it was having kids that made exercise feel like a delicious solitary escape rather than a chore? having that time to myself - and moving through all my new parent angst. it just became indispensable very quickly. OH and while running, i hang out with my parasocial podcast besties which is another treat.
ha maybe? my go to are jogs (I walk steep hills), and my cult of choice, the class. it's VERY white lady woo woo but i love it. a combo of strength, cardio, yoga, and huge focus on breathing and cathartic sounds. like grunts, squawks, whatever.
Ugh I hate this. Emptying the goddamn dishwasher every morning. If it’s empty, no one has an excuse not to put their dirty dishes in all day, after dinner cleanup is way easier, and the kitchen stays fairly reasonable for the next morning. I HATE that it’s a reasonable chore that takes less than 5 minutes. I’ve timed it bc I hate it soooo much.
Yes! Such a quick task that in my mind takes an hour 😂
Turning on the grayscale color filter on my phone. So annoying yet so much less scrolling when I do it.
someone already said it but no alcohol. Stopped bc I was dealing with health issues and it wasn't helping, and technically I am not "off" it, but I have probably 5 drinks a year at this point. I feel so much better, my weight shifted, my face looks different. I hadn't realized how much I had been drinking, until it was cold turkey gone. I do sweet tea with ice now, or coffee ice cream, or lemonade and sprite and ice- anything fun and cold for the evening, depending on the season!
I need to vacuum more than I do. Tracking my spending. I do make my bed every day- the apartment is so small that to not make it would have an enormous chaotic effect on the space.
Finding the kind of exercise that I don't like to miss bc it's so much fun. I go to ballet class 3x a week and enjoy it so much. I remember struggling so so bad with all other exercise- gym, running, walking, weights, etc etc.
Leaving the house at least once a day. I'm not an aimless "walk" kind of person so there has to be a destination- coffee shop, grocery store, etc. Luckily I walk to my job, so that's a guaranteed walk 5 days a week, and I have church/dance on the weekend, so my life takes me out of the house daily, and it's been good for me.
ooooh i really relate to the leaving the house once a day piece - i grumble about carting kids to after school events but it invariably makes me feel better to connect with humans and the greater community!
I recently discovered I’m also not an aimless walk (or bike ride or run) kind of person either. I so strongly prefer to have those things fit purposefully into the day’s other activities. It feels un-Zen, but I’m trying not to judge myself for it.
Since I'm breastfeeding and pumping, taking my vitamins and drinking plenty of water is annoyingly good for me (and baby). Forgetting my vitamins consistently reminds me what a difference they make on my milk production. Also, second the oatmeal for breakfast. Sometimes it's boring, but it's the easiest, best breakfast.
Expensive face serums AM and PM, a nightly gratitude practice (just writing down three good things that happened that day - I haven’t done it in a while and I notice the difference in my tolerance levels for the unexpected bullshit), walking outside a couple times a week, drinking so much water that I almost drown myself, and, lately, going to sleep completely sober (no alcohol or weed). Ugh.
My “trying to be a healthy 40-something” breakfast of plain Greek yogurt, defrosted frozen cherries, hemp seeds, slivered almonds and a sprinkle of granola. It’s healthy, it’s filling, it makes me feel good. I disliked Greek yogurt for years but finally realized I can just literally water it down to a preferable texture. Haven’t looked back!
Make the bed! - I'm a firm believer in clear surfaces to get/keep mind grounded (bed always works in the bedroom, but I can't guarantee any effects elsewhere]. If you just use a duvet, it's really so easy peasy. I also value clear kitchen counters, but that can be very challenging.
ughhhhh YES (hence name of newsletter lol)
Making everyone’s beds, everyday…the rest of the kids rooms are a mess but somehow beds being made makes the chaos much easier for me to deal with.
Not drinking caffeine after noon! I love tea and could happily drink it until I go to sleep. I read that it takes 12 hours for the caffeine in our system to half, and I do notice a difference in my ability to go to sleep.
Consistency. At exercise, drinking water, not sitting, socializing, going outside, etc.
So yeah, not just doing the good for you things but doing them consistently *as she remembers to drink water*
truly consistency seems to be the actual magic bullet with ALL Of this stuff!
At work: Clearing (and wiping / dusting) my desk
At home: Clearing and cleaning the kitchen counter. I call it "zeroing" the kitchen.
Hate hate hate both chores, especially before I begin. But lo and behold, I am a calmer, saner, more productive person when I'm done.
Also: journaling. Gawd.
Okay, I know it's been a minute since this post, but I was thinking about it today and had to come back because my answer is sports bras. Lately I've really been pushing back against tight or uncomfortable bras, bras that try to make my body do something it doesn't do, etc. I've been struggling to find my correct bra size so I've just been defaulting to Soma wireless bralettes that are like...good enough for now. BUT for the last few weeks I've been walking a few miles by the river at a pretty strong clip in a bra without enough support, and it's causing me some discomfort. I finally bought a new sports bra and I'm so annoyed at how much better it feels. I'm not even sure it quite fits properly but it's tight enough to hold everything in place and I am so much more comfortable. ARGH.
Doing my little skincare morning and night (nothing fancy just washing my face, moisturising and using sunscreen at the appropriate junctures). Also, ugh, exercise.
Making my bed every single day (except "sheets day" when I change the sheets) 100% helps me feel more centered and in control of my life. I started this twenty-five years ago after a bout with depression and I still swear by it. Do I still have major mood swings, depression, and anxiety? Of course. But this tiny little thing helps me feel better. So annoying, I know. I also like folding laundry and putting it away, so I'm just super annoying.
This thread is hilarious!
A big one: When getting asked to do something firstly listen to myself if I really want to do this instead of giving in to my innate reflex to say "Yes, of course". And then actually say no if I mean no. Absolute banger!
Oh, and I'm one for bed making, clears my head and I use it as a small creative act each day (god, I love linen). Does anyone know any good bed wear/linen substack pages?
Brushing my teeth (PM round) when I still have energy (say, a little while after dinner) rather than as a creaky, zombie right before bed when I can barely stand up...
Regular exercise. Absolutely infuriating that this makes me feel more energetic and less stressed when I hate it. How dare exercise be this way.