Especially for people in Red States - one VERY impactful thing you can do is to contact your elected officials. You can email, phone, physically write, use a tool like ResistBot (makes it SO easy - it has pre-loaded messages). Getting negative messaging to your Senator can give them cover to try and stop some of these picks. Without hearing from constituents, they are going to cave, and fast.
And in case you think this won't work - in the first T administration, they tried to take apart the ACA, so many people on both sides complained, they backed off.
I'm organizing a bunch of friends to read Jessica Valenti's book, Abortion, and get together to talk about it and make a plan to take care of each other and folks more vulnerable than us. I decided I'm going deep on that issue, because broad will burn me out. Obviously I will still pay attention and do the basic things on other issues, because it all intersects, but in terms of my time, talent, and treasure, reproductive justice is it. Deep, but not siloed. That's the plan...for now?!
also I'll just add a suggestion that one easy way to act in solidarity with people more vulnerable than yourself is to mask when you are in public spaces if possible. this is really helpful for protecting immunocompromised people, especially people who are disabled, young children, and elderly people, from pathogens that other people may not get sick from. and it's a consistent ask from disability Rights advocates!
I wrote physical, handwritten letters about the importance of the DOE to my senators and congressional representative last week. I'm planning on doing a lot of letter writing during the next four years. I'm focusing on education, since my kid has an iep and I work in higher ed and am directly impacted by the trump administration's potential plans for education. I'm also continuing my monthly donations to abortion funds. That's a great place to send money to if you can. In terms of finding community, I'm planning on starting a virtual crafting night with some far flung friends. I picked up an embroidery kit to teach myself last week because I need something fun and pretty to distract myself that keeps my hands away from scrolling on my phone.
I typically send to their local offices. I found during the first Trump administration that the voicemail was often full in their DC offices but not as full in their local offices. Also, for me, sending to the local office with my home address just emphasizes that I am a constituent.
I tend to call the local offices because I'm way more likely to get a person to answer. When I was calling one of my senators to support a bill to support independent restaurants, I ended up having a lovely conversation with the staffer about our favorite restaurants in Baltimore!
I decided to step up as a co-lead for the Northern Nevada chapter of Authors Against Book Bans, and have applied to be a lead for Chamber of Mothers in Northern Nevada. During the election, we defunded our local libraries in large part due to a misinformation campaign. So I've been active in trying to ensure continued funding for libraries through our Board of County Commissioners (who now control those previously allocated funds) - which has included signing and circulating a petition to preserve library funding, making public comment for the board of county commissioners meeting, emailing my county commissioner, and doing all these steps on my partner's behalf as well.
I live in Missouri and everything here has been pretty awful. Voters just approved abortion rights and minimum wage amendments but I have no hope in my state government. I’m a librarian and our state government is trying to dismantle trust in libraries and education. I can’t do anything big right now… I’m just trying to remember that people closest to me are feeling the way I am, and I’m not alone.
Showing up for your community as a librarian, providing free and equal access to information, IS helping people who need it. It’s horrifying how libraries are under attack. We need you more than ever. ❤️
I don’t feel like I am doing anything big- I have been trying not to demonize those around me who voted for Trump or didn’t vote at all (I can think of 3 coworkers at least off the top of my head who didn’t vote at all plus a friend who wasn’t eligible to vote because of his citizenship status- he has a green card and his husband who grew up in Pennsylvania did vote for Kamala). I snoozed some of my Facebook friends until I am ready to engage with their content again.
I am certainly willing to have conversations with many of the people in my life who voted differently than me (the ones who keep it respectful), and I am interested to see how these conversations evolve over the next few months. I understand all those who feel like they need a break from friends and family members who just “aren’t getting it,” but despite being super frustrated and sad the first week, I am feeling more resigned to this just being how it’s going to be, and I think that keeping communication going will help us understand more about how this could have happened so that we can make sure it doesn’t happen again.
One of my coworkers who didn’t register or vote is a girl who at 19 got pregnant despite being on birth control; she is now 20 and is having a baby boy in February- it baffles me that she didn’t feel the need to vote for Kamala who was supporting reproductive rights. I have been talking to her a lot about pregnancy and her relationship because she and the baby’s father have broken up, and she is having a tough time. I am always willing to listen to people tell their stories and try to help people feel seen and understood (in my counseling classes in grad school I was very drawn to reality therapy- tough love vibes, solution-focused therapy, and person-centered therapy which was all about being empathetic and validating and showing unconditional positive regard for people), so I am still trying to do that even though my sadness over the state of the world is not making it easy to be as compassionate and empathetic as I usually am.
My sister tells me all the time she doesn’t know how I do it because she just wants to tell people to shut the f up when they’re being annoying, so it’s clearly a skill I have really worked on over the years!
I wrote and deleted shut the fuck up approximately 25 times in 3 days before I went to Hawaii. I am slightly more zen now. I haven’t talked to any GOP people though except my friend whose 5 yo has all the appointments regarding his epilepsy. I sent her family a gift card and said I am thinking of them and she has DMed me a few times- I know she thinks blaming vaccines and food additives is an answer and I’m trying to remain compassionate.
I am still having a hard time feeling like anything I’m doing is accomplishing much, I am thankful the races I had advocated for through my postcard writing went to the Dems- Josh Stein won governor, Jeff Jackson won AG, and Mo Green won superintendent of public instruction. we heard this morning Allison Riggs was ahead by 625 votes for NC Supreme Court- Jefferson Griffin called for a recount.
My number one cause for the end of the year- Ashley Spivey has been talking about the importance of passing the SHINE for Autumn Act (Stillbirth Health Improvement and Education) before the end of the year- it is a bipartisan Act. Her son CJ was stillborn on my/my twin’s birthday, November 26, 2020. My friend Caroline’s daughter Emma was also stillborn on September 3, 2015- she volunteered with me through Guilford County Democrats and we both have second graders. The three other stillbirths in my close circle-my husband’s cousin Carolina lost her baby Ella on November 19, 2015, a church friend Jennifer lost her baby Campbell on July 31, 2017, and my childhood friend Jaimie lost her baby Landon on November 29, 2017.
There are too many preventable losses every year due to lack of education and this cause is very close to my heart. There are state specific actions for each person to take- they will have to start over if it doesn’t pass before the end of the year. In 2022 it passed the House but not the Senate.
I randomly had a much wanted breast reduction scheduled last week. It has been a great distracter and feels symbolic in many ways. All that gross attention I didn't want from old men all my adult life... goodbye! It feels a bit of a fuck you to those standards of sexiness and taking back my body for me and what I want out of it. And it is a bit of putting my head in the sand so that I don't have to think of the awfulness for a couple weeks while I heal. I've been rewatching The Letdown (netflix) and if anyone hasn't watched it, it is a MUST watch!
I hit my news saturation yesterday, so I will still clear for a while. In the meantime, a friend of mine and I are starting a local group that meets regularly to connect and discuss action opportunities. I really think meeting in person is key — there is something about social media and technology that has siloed us and kept us from organizing within our communities. We are hoping to establish a regular group that can also reach out and connect with other community groups to build a network, however slowly.
For several years I’ve helped to maintain a community fridge to provide 24 hour access to free food for anyone who needs it, and while I’m sort of all over the place with my post-election anxiety and despair, it has helped as a reminder that grassroots efforts can make a daily impact. And for bolstering I just finished watching the historical holocaust drama “We Were the Lucky Ones” which is based on an inspiring true story of the survival of different members of one family. Knowing that they had the resolve and strength to fight back against the absolute worst horrors imaginable, unrelentingly, for themselves and others gives me faith that we can navigate our current situation. Resist.
I'm heavily investing in my local community. Taking a position on our church's council to ensure it stays open and a safe space, creating a book club of women in our neighborhood to create a sense of belonging, attending village board meetings, and regularly emailing and calling all my state representatives and federal ones.
The news is really hard right now. My husband's family and parts of mine are incredibly conservative and I know them as good people who care about their family but have been given the kool-aid from their church, their schools, and their community. I think I'm going to be willing to have conversations with them - but I doubt they'll ask.
Right now, I am just trying to protect my peace. The internet is a stream of one awful headline after another. My heart needs a break. I’m trying to stay offline and enjoy the present. Today’s troubles are enough, tomorrow can take care of itself.
This is sort of like burying my head in the sand, but feels necessary at the moment.
For what it's worth, I'm doing the same but counting it as a conscious act rather than burying my head. The whole point of the awful news is to crowd your hope and make you feel as though there is nothing you can do and/or force you to focus on the dumbest aspects of what is happening to distract you from real issues. I've been off news and socials since three days before the election and it's made a huge difference. There will always be some new asshole, I control my own attention and I don't have to give it to them.
I co-run an Instagram account called @momsforindiana with another Hoosier mom. There is a whole network of state account leaders whose goal it is to provide targeted actioning and community at the state and local level. Otherwise, I'm just trying to take care of myself and rest ahead of the Indiana legislative session where residents elected a gov./lt. gov ticket with an avowed Christian Nationalist.
doing what I can in both my day jobs (I'm a therapist & a supervisor for therapists in training), including talking with clients about small steps they can take, which has been effective, I think! I've got an idea about a big thing I'd like to tackle but it needs to marinate - it requires additional research and communication with several different people. also talking consistently with my friends about this and trying to connect more to my neighbors!
We started a local group called "Women Who Give a Fuck." We are dividing and conquering issues locally including mental health and public education to name a few. We're thinking small and focusing our efforts where we feel we can have the biggest impact. Just knowing how many people in our community care about the same things and want a BETTER future for the next generation is the fuel I need to get through the next 4 +? years of the hell that will be Trump 2.0
Especially for people in Red States - one VERY impactful thing you can do is to contact your elected officials. You can email, phone, physically write, use a tool like ResistBot (makes it SO easy - it has pre-loaded messages). Getting negative messaging to your Senator can give them cover to try and stop some of these picks. Without hearing from constituents, they are going to cave, and fast.
https://resist.bot/
And in case you think this won't work - in the first T administration, they tried to take apart the ACA, so many people on both sides complained, they backed off.
I'm organizing a bunch of friends to read Jessica Valenti's book, Abortion, and get together to talk about it and make a plan to take care of each other and folks more vulnerable than us. I decided I'm going deep on that issue, because broad will burn me out. Obviously I will still pay attention and do the basic things on other issues, because it all intersects, but in terms of my time, talent, and treasure, reproductive justice is it. Deep, but not siloed. That's the plan...for now?!
also I'll just add a suggestion that one easy way to act in solidarity with people more vulnerable than yourself is to mask when you are in public spaces if possible. this is really helpful for protecting immunocompromised people, especially people who are disabled, young children, and elderly people, from pathogens that other people may not get sick from. and it's a consistent ask from disability Rights advocates!
I wrote physical, handwritten letters about the importance of the DOE to my senators and congressional representative last week. I'm planning on doing a lot of letter writing during the next four years. I'm focusing on education, since my kid has an iep and I work in higher ed and am directly impacted by the trump administration's potential plans for education. I'm also continuing my monthly donations to abortion funds. That's a great place to send money to if you can. In terms of finding community, I'm planning on starting a virtual crafting night with some far flung friends. I picked up an embroidery kit to teach myself last week because I need something fun and pretty to distract myself that keeps my hands away from scrolling on my phone.
I love this - putting pen to paper feels like it's not only action but therapeutic!
I love this idea! Quick question: do you send the letters to their offices in DC, or in your state?
I typically send to their local offices. I found during the first Trump administration that the voicemail was often full in their DC offices but not as full in their local offices. Also, for me, sending to the local office with my home address just emphasizes that I am a constituent.
I tend to call the local offices because I'm way more likely to get a person to answer. When I was calling one of my senators to support a bill to support independent restaurants, I ended up having a lovely conversation with the staffer about our favorite restaurants in Baltimore!
I decided to step up as a co-lead for the Northern Nevada chapter of Authors Against Book Bans, and have applied to be a lead for Chamber of Mothers in Northern Nevada. During the election, we defunded our local libraries in large part due to a misinformation campaign. So I've been active in trying to ensure continued funding for libraries through our Board of County Commissioners (who now control those previously allocated funds) - which has included signing and circulating a petition to preserve library funding, making public comment for the board of county commissioners meeting, emailing my county commissioner, and doing all these steps on my partner's behalf as well.
LOVE this gemma!
I live in Missouri and everything here has been pretty awful. Voters just approved abortion rights and minimum wage amendments but I have no hope in my state government. I’m a librarian and our state government is trying to dismantle trust in libraries and education. I can’t do anything big right now… I’m just trying to remember that people closest to me are feeling the way I am, and I’m not alone.
Showing up for your community as a librarian, providing free and equal access to information, IS helping people who need it. It’s horrifying how libraries are under attack. We need you more than ever. ❤️
I'm so sorry Christina - ugh.
It must be so hard to be a librarian in a red state right now. Librarian solidarity here!
I don’t feel like I am doing anything big- I have been trying not to demonize those around me who voted for Trump or didn’t vote at all (I can think of 3 coworkers at least off the top of my head who didn’t vote at all plus a friend who wasn’t eligible to vote because of his citizenship status- he has a green card and his husband who grew up in Pennsylvania did vote for Kamala). I snoozed some of my Facebook friends until I am ready to engage with their content again.
I am certainly willing to have conversations with many of the people in my life who voted differently than me (the ones who keep it respectful), and I am interested to see how these conversations evolve over the next few months. I understand all those who feel like they need a break from friends and family members who just “aren’t getting it,” but despite being super frustrated and sad the first week, I am feeling more resigned to this just being how it’s going to be, and I think that keeping communication going will help us understand more about how this could have happened so that we can make sure it doesn’t happen again.
One of my coworkers who didn’t register or vote is a girl who at 19 got pregnant despite being on birth control; she is now 20 and is having a baby boy in February- it baffles me that she didn’t feel the need to vote for Kamala who was supporting reproductive rights. I have been talking to her a lot about pregnancy and her relationship because she and the baby’s father have broken up, and she is having a tough time. I am always willing to listen to people tell their stories and try to help people feel seen and understood (in my counseling classes in grad school I was very drawn to reality therapy- tough love vibes, solution-focused therapy, and person-centered therapy which was all about being empathetic and validating and showing unconditional positive regard for people), so I am still trying to do that even though my sadness over the state of the world is not making it easy to be as compassionate and empathetic as I usually am.
See I feel like willingness to converse with people IS something big! Something I definitely struggle with personally.
My sister tells me all the time she doesn’t know how I do it because she just wants to tell people to shut the f up when they’re being annoying, so it’s clearly a skill I have really worked on over the years!
I wrote and deleted shut the fuck up approximately 25 times in 3 days before I went to Hawaii. I am slightly more zen now. I haven’t talked to any GOP people though except my friend whose 5 yo has all the appointments regarding his epilepsy. I sent her family a gift card and said I am thinking of them and she has DMed me a few times- I know she thinks blaming vaccines and food additives is an answer and I’m trying to remain compassionate.
I am still having a hard time feeling like anything I’m doing is accomplishing much, I am thankful the races I had advocated for through my postcard writing went to the Dems- Josh Stein won governor, Jeff Jackson won AG, and Mo Green won superintendent of public instruction. we heard this morning Allison Riggs was ahead by 625 votes for NC Supreme Court- Jefferson Griffin called for a recount.
My number one cause for the end of the year- Ashley Spivey has been talking about the importance of passing the SHINE for Autumn Act (Stillbirth Health Improvement and Education) before the end of the year- it is a bipartisan Act. Her son CJ was stillborn on my/my twin’s birthday, November 26, 2020. My friend Caroline’s daughter Emma was also stillborn on September 3, 2015- she volunteered with me through Guilford County Democrats and we both have second graders. The three other stillbirths in my close circle-my husband’s cousin Carolina lost her baby Ella on November 19, 2015, a church friend Jennifer lost her baby Campbell on July 31, 2017, and my childhood friend Jaimie lost her baby Landon on November 29, 2017.
There are too many preventable losses every year due to lack of education and this cause is very close to my heart. There are state specific actions for each person to take- they will have to start over if it doesn’t pass before the end of the year. In 2022 it passed the House but not the Senate.
https://www.shineforautumnact.org/help
I randomly had a much wanted breast reduction scheduled last week. It has been a great distracter and feels symbolic in many ways. All that gross attention I didn't want from old men all my adult life... goodbye! It feels a bit of a fuck you to those standards of sexiness and taking back my body for me and what I want out of it. And it is a bit of putting my head in the sand so that I don't have to think of the awfulness for a couple weeks while I heal. I've been rewatching The Letdown (netflix) and if anyone hasn't watched it, it is a MUST watch!
congrats!
I hit my news saturation yesterday, so I will still clear for a while. In the meantime, a friend of mine and I are starting a local group that meets regularly to connect and discuss action opportunities. I really think meeting in person is key — there is something about social media and technology that has siloed us and kept us from organizing within our communities. We are hoping to establish a regular group that can also reach out and connect with other community groups to build a network, however slowly.
For several years I’ve helped to maintain a community fridge to provide 24 hour access to free food for anyone who needs it, and while I’m sort of all over the place with my post-election anxiety and despair, it has helped as a reminder that grassroots efforts can make a daily impact. And for bolstering I just finished watching the historical holocaust drama “We Were the Lucky Ones” which is based on an inspiring true story of the survival of different members of one family. Knowing that they had the resolve and strength to fight back against the absolute worst horrors imaginable, unrelentingly, for themselves and others gives me faith that we can navigate our current situation. Resist.
I'm heavily investing in my local community. Taking a position on our church's council to ensure it stays open and a safe space, creating a book club of women in our neighborhood to create a sense of belonging, attending village board meetings, and regularly emailing and calling all my state representatives and federal ones.
The news is really hard right now. My husband's family and parts of mine are incredibly conservative and I know them as good people who care about their family but have been given the kool-aid from their church, their schools, and their community. I think I'm going to be willing to have conversations with them - but I doubt they'll ask.
Right now, I am just trying to protect my peace. The internet is a stream of one awful headline after another. My heart needs a break. I’m trying to stay offline and enjoy the present. Today’s troubles are enough, tomorrow can take care of itself.
This is sort of like burying my head in the sand, but feels necessary at the moment.
For what it's worth, I'm doing the same but counting it as a conscious act rather than burying my head. The whole point of the awful news is to crowd your hope and make you feel as though there is nothing you can do and/or force you to focus on the dumbest aspects of what is happening to distract you from real issues. I've been off news and socials since three days before the election and it's made a huge difference. There will always be some new asshole, I control my own attention and I don't have to give it to them.
I co-run an Instagram account called @momsforindiana with another Hoosier mom. There is a whole network of state account leaders whose goal it is to provide targeted actioning and community at the state and local level. Otherwise, I'm just trying to take care of myself and rest ahead of the Indiana legislative session where residents elected a gov./lt. gov ticket with an avowed Christian Nationalist.
doing what I can in both my day jobs (I'm a therapist & a supervisor for therapists in training), including talking with clients about small steps they can take, which has been effective, I think! I've got an idea about a big thing I'd like to tackle but it needs to marinate - it requires additional research and communication with several different people. also talking consistently with my friends about this and trying to connect more to my neighbors!
We started a local group called "Women Who Give a Fuck." We are dividing and conquering issues locally including mental health and public education to name a few. We're thinking small and focusing our efforts where we feel we can have the biggest impact. Just knowing how many people in our community care about the same things and want a BETTER future for the next generation is the fuel I need to get through the next 4 +? years of the hell that will be Trump 2.0
It's one of the only thing that helps, right? Being in community with others who GIVE A FUCK.